Woke up this morning, felt better. Then, then the thoughts of the day arrived, I stopped feeling better.
I will not explore the details of yesterday, it is painful, it hurts, it will spoil the day so in time I might write about it, but not any time soon.
For now, I need to continue with and focus on self-improvement, putting in my best at all things and improving my station in life. I need to look ahead long-term and see where I want to find myself.
It is a bit difficult to accept that you weren't "good" enough for someone or someone is selected over you, as has been the case my entire life infact. Hmmm, there are 2 choices, to solutions and 2 ways.
Accept that sometimes you won't be good enough.
Make sure you are the only option to consider.
The latter seems much easier.
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Managed to get through the day, I did extend an 'seen' invitation to hang out over the weekend. No response, message received. Let's move on. She's fishing for compliments, I'm not willing to entertain this anymore. Sucks that someone can do that to another - it's immature, hurtful and malicious, even after knowing that someone has had past trauma with another doing exactly that.
Well - one should be glad for these learning experiences. Better to get them out of the way early than sit with someone like that on a permanent basis.
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I'm doing better, I think. Not quite over it, but doing better. I'll be taking a break for joining that group for a while - it always seems the US folks are "fake nice". I've come to dislike this sentiment. Most of the time, it's easily-spotted but some hide it well.
I'm proud of myself, I'm content and looking forward to a better tomorrow (lit, and fig)
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